My Friends Opened An Ice Cream Shop
Living my childhood summertime dreams but also discovering the dangerous world of frozen dairy. Plus recs for Grace Perry on surfing, Fredrik Backman on writing, and Rafil Kroll-Zaidi in Branson, MO.
Just in time for summer, my friends Phil and Molly opened a new ice cream shop here in LA.
If I could tell 10-year-old me that one day he would be friends with people who have complete control over an ice cream factory, he would have shaken my hand and told me, “nice work, future Chris.” Then I would have told him to invest heavily in GameStop stock and he would have said, “that also tracks with my understanding of the world. You’re a pretty cool dude, old me.” And then I would have dabbed1.
Phil and Molly opened up a branch of Handel’s Homemade Ice Cream, which involves making ice cream fresh every day. In addition to being ice cream chefs, Phil is an internationally acclaimed poet and Molly is a talented therapist. So, while it’s not on their official websites, I think there’s a clear implication that if you can’t fix your problems with art or medicine, you might as well try ice cream.
I showed up to their opening night party with family and friends in tow because I do not miss out on free ice cream. As I’ve written about before, I don’t say no to free food of any kind. Often to my detriment! I’m one of the only people I know who has repeatedly gotten food poisoning because I didn’t want to waste free food even though it was very clearly already spoiled. (Note to future self: eating spoiled food does not prevent it from being wasted! It simply gets wasted in a much worse way later when you are vomiting. Put down the rancid hummus and walk away.)
Luckily, Phil and Molly’s ice cream shop offered only fresh, delicious frozen treats. No dangers there.
Eating an ice cream cone on a warm summer night made me very nostalgic. For the first time in a long time, I remembered how there was a Tasti D-Lite on the same corner as my apartment building growing up. This was a low calorie ice cream alternative. It was very popular with middle-aged parents on a diet. We’re talking about a brand that served as a metaphor on Sex and the City for Charlotte being willing to settle for less. And yet, after middle school let out, my friends and I would crowd inside to sample as many flavors as they’d let us. They gave the samples in these little tiny paper cups, kind of like the ones you get mouthwash in at the dentist, and you’d have to squeeze it out into your mouth or try to jam your tongue in there. Either way, a lot of the flavor profile you’d get would be “soggy paper cup.”
We went to Tasti D-Lite only because we walked past it every day. We could not have cared less about their low calorie business model. But I do remember one day being distinctly unnerved when I learned that they couldn’t legally call what we were eating “ice cream.” I guzzled down fewer tiny paper cups from them after that.
I also have many memories of getting ice cream from Mister Softee trucks around the city. Nothing beat walking in a park on a hot, muggy day and hearing that iconic jingle. I’m also obsessed with this 2016 New York Times article about the “long-running, occasionally bloody feuds between ice cream vendors for control of the city’s prime selling spots.” Several times since the article came out, I’ve tried to get ice cream truck guys to tell me about battles or any preparations they’ve made to counter a hostile ice cream truck attack. They always look over their shoulders nervously and refuse to answer.
Relatedly, one of my favorite stories from my dad is how he drove an ice cream truck one summer to help pay for school. He was confused about the company because every time he picked up his ice cream bars, it was from a new warehouse with a new business name. Later on, he found out that he had been the only guy not selling drugs out of his ice cream truck. I love the image of my dad showing up and being like “Another 5 cases of push-up pops please! And don’t forget the ice cream sandwiches!” while everyone else is so confused about what this earnest naïve man is doing genuinely selling frozen treats while they mastermind a criminal empire.
As far as I know, Phil and Molly haven’t had to become a drug front or resort to violence to defend their ice cream selling turf. I hope it stays that way! But if it comes down to hand-to-hand combat versus a rival soft-serve supplier, I’ve got their back. I won’t be at all helpful in the fight, but I will be there standing behind their back, eating free ice cream and trying to dab.
My projects and upcoming events:
LIVE IN SAN FRANCISCO: Wrong Answers Only at The Independent - Sunday, June 30th at 7 p.m. Comedians Josh Sharp, Aparna Nancherla, Joanna Hausmann, and I try to understand the science of dark matter with Dr. Risa Wechsler. Details and tickets here
PODCAST: How to Be a Better Human (TED/PRX) - Prentis Hemphill spends a lot of time thinking about what it means to heal. As a therapist, an activist, and an author, Prentis connects our bodies, our minds, and the world around us. Listen to us talk about “the meaning of embodiment” here (or wherever you get podcasts).
This week’s list
GREAT:
My friend and surf buddy Grace Perry wrote an essay for Outside about losing her brother and figuring out how to mourn his loss and remember him. Surprisingly, the article also contains some of the funniest and most accurate descriptions of me I’ve ever read. A true joy to be lovingly roasted in such a beautiful piece. What’s the Right Way to Grieve My Brother? I Try Surfing.
FUNNY:
I haven’t read any of Frederik Backman’s books but after watching this incredible speech, they moved immediately to the top of my list. This is one of the best descriptions of writing (and creativity) that I’ve ever heard. He’s not a standup comedian but he brought the house down. Fredrik Backman on Creative Anxiety and Procrastination (h/t Erica Reisman)
INTERESTING:
I love a travel piece that’s about so much more than just the physical place. Rafil Kroll-Zaidi’s dispatch from Branson, Missouri is a wild ride. It’s about the cultural and political bubbles that many of us live in. It’s about what it means to take a vacation and what constitutes “entertainment.” It’s about race and class in the United States. And it’s also about Elvis, wax museums, Yakov Smirnov, and dinosaur fossils. The Branson Pilgrim
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Slowly melting into a waffle cone,
Chris Duffy
This has been Bright Spots, a newsletter.
…wait, who are you?
I'm Chris Duffy, a comedian, TV writer, podcast host, and both a former fifth grade teacher and a former fifth grade student. I’m currently writing a nonfiction book about humor for Doubleday.
Whoaaa, Tasti-D-Lite sensory memories just came flooding back. So much better than the LA equivalent, The Bigg Chill. Can't wait to stop by Handel's!
Ice cream makes everything better💗. Keep dabbing, old Chris.