Appetizers, Pheromones, and the Best Theme Parties
Friends' birthdays worth going to bed late for. Plus recs for Wendy Mac's DrawTogether, Matt Porter's nervous flier, and Michael February's surf story
I don’t go to a lot of parties these days. Mostly because:
I’m in my late thirties
I don’t drink
I like to go to bed by 9:30 p.m.
If I make it out of the house and I’m heading to an event, that’s a big occasion. I’ve got to make it worth my while. And nothing makes it more immediately worth my while than a good theme.
This week, I joined the celebration for my friend Ashley’s birthday at a bar crawl. But this was no ordinary bar crawl. It was a crawl focused largely on appetizers and over-the-top drinks. I may not be throwing back shots, but you better believe I love an event where I am moving from fried pickles to nachos to onion rings and then back again.
Even better, this bar crawl took place at Universal CityWalk, which is like an LA version of Times Square (if Times Square was inside of a gated community). It’s an extremely sanitized, very corporate, tourist trap. Basically if all of 1999 Mayor Rudy Giuliani’s dreams had come true.
Ashley assembled a group of comedians and we descended on Margaritaville, Bubba Gump’s Shrimp Company, the NBC Sports Bar and Grill, and more. It was so silly and so fun. I don’t think I’d realized before how deeply Bubba Gump’s is Forrest Gump themed. And I am so glad that I can now say I was in Margaritaville at the exact right hour to say “It’s 5 o’clock somewhere and somewhere is here.” Best of all, I was home and asleep (smelling like the inside of a deep fryer) by 9 p.m.
Another fun recent birthday was when my friend Katy organized a “Sports Night” to celebrate another spin around the sun. The only thing is Katy knew that the majority of her friends (myself included) are not sports people. So she lured us to the park with snacks, unusual games, and chalk for the artists to draw on the basketball court while the jocks played.
We ended up mostly playing an invented sport that involved bouncing a koosh ball off a handheld trampoline and then taking over a basketball court to play a round of knockout. The house rules included a regulation that stipulated that anytime you weren’t shooting the basketball, you had to be dancing The Twist.
At one point, a random woman came up to us and asked if we were a group of some kind. I think she thought she was witnessing an experimental physical therapy program in action. Like we’d all been bussed to the park from an intensive hip treatment center. Later on, a child who looked to be about 9 years old joined the line and instantly put my basketball shooting skills to shame. Luckily, there were snacks to eat and chalk for me to draw with when I had to go sit on the sidelines.
Of all the theme parties I’ve ever attended, none was more memorable than the Pheromone Party my friend Bianca once organized in Brooklyn. We were all instructed to wear a plain white t-shirt to bed for the three nights before the event and not to wash it afterwards. At the party, each shirt was collected and put into a separate ziplock bag, marked only with a number. Then we all went around smelling each of the bags and writing down our impressions and score.
I would have thought that everyone’s smelly t-shirt would have smelled bad. In fact, some of the t-shirts did smell terrible. Others smelled really good. Attractive even! But what was really mind-blowing is that every t-shirt had at least one person who thought it smelled terrible and one person who thought that same t-shirt smelled amazing. Pheromones are real, I guess! Also now I know that one of my friends naturally produces an odor that I described as “an apple-farro salad” and that someone thinks I smell “like a clean mop in the sun.”
I don’t know if that was meant to be a compliment but I will gladly take it as one!
In the meantime, this mop needs to take a nap in case I end up at another social gathering this month.
My projects and upcoming events:
LIVE IN NYC: Wrong Answers Only at Symphony Space - Thursday, September 19th at 7 p.m. Tickets are on sale for this show where an expert on computer security gets interviewed by a panel of comics that includes me and Phoebe Robinson! Details and tickets here
PODCAST: How to Be a Better Human (TED/PRX) - This week’s podcast episode is a compilation of some of the best advice about how to find work/life balance. Listen here (or wherever you get your podcasts)
AUDIOBOOK: Let's Hang Out: Making (and Keeping) Friends, Acquaintances, and Other Nonromantic Relationships - You can listen or read my new audiobook / e-book on Everand. You have to create an account to listen or read, but you can get a 60-day free trial with promo code ChrisDuffy60 or if you click this link it should automatically fill out that code.
PODCAST: Care and Feeding (Slate) - I’m a guest co-host on another episode of Slate’s parenting podcast. I joined regular hosts Lucy Lopez and Zak Rosen to answer a listener question about what to eat for dinner when you’re out of ideas.
PODCAST: Troubled Waters (MaximumFun) - I’m a guest on former MTV VJ Dave Holmes’ pop culture quiz podcast. I competed against the very funny Laura Merli and the whole thing was silly and delightful. Listen here
This week’s list
GREAT:
Wendy MacNaughton makes everything fun. As a person, she’s just bursting with energy and joy and it’s so fun to watch or listen to or read. Her ongoing participatory art project, Draw Together, is a way for adults to tap back into the fun of making something. It’s also a way to let go of the idea that art is supposed to be perfect and a way to connect with strangers. Wendy is the best. Watch this great video of Draw Together in action (that also includes a toolkit for how to bring the project to your own neighborhood or community): What happens if two complete strangers draw each other?
FUNNY:
I could not admire Matt Porter any more than I do. He’s so funny, thoughtful, and sharp. He’s constantly creating projects and events that bring people together and spark new comedic collaborations. He’s a mensch through and through. I feel lucky to know the guy and I’m always excited to root for his successes. He just got his first piece of humor writing published in The New Yorker and it’s a great one: What A Nervous Flier Hears
(also check out his deep bench of excellent comedy sketches with his longtime collaborator, Charlie Hankin)
INTERESTING:
Even as an avowed non-sports person, I love watching the Olympics. There’s something special about watching people achieve their dreams. The stories and sacrifices behind the athletic performances are incredible. One profile that stood out to me, in particular, was of Michael February, the “boundary-breaking surfer and the first Black South African on the World Surf League Championship Tour.” This short documentary about him and his father is beautifully done. How the Ocean Is Liberating for One of South Africa’s Best Surfers
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That's it for this week. Thanks for reading! Please share Bright Spots with anyone you think might enjoy it.
Sent from inside a pheromone filled plastic bag,
Chris Duffy
This has been Bright Spots, a newsletter.
…wait, who are you?
I'm Chris Duffy, a comedian, TV writer, podcast host, and both a former fifth grade teacher and a former fifth grade student. I’m currently writing a nonfiction book about humor for Doubleday.