A Broken Down Car Restores My Faith in Humanity

Thank you aging Honda Civic! Plus recs for Solomon Missouri on Alabama IVF, Aparna Nancherla on music, and Shayla Love on luxury air.

Mighty Mo is a 102-year-old world champion swimmer. If you’ve been reading Bright Spots for a while, you know that she’s also become one of my closest friends here in L.A.

Mo is still sharp as a tack, still swimming regularly, and still living independently. She’s a social butterfly, constantly going out for breakfast or hosting get togethers on her porch. She’s in two book clubs, sends emails to swim friends around the world, and is involved in the University of Chicago alumni association, where she got her Masters in Social Work.

She’s amazing. There’s a reason they call her Mighty Mo and it’s not just because of her swim records.

What’s lovely about being friends with someone who is 102 is that sometimes Mo and I will be chatting about books we’re reading or people we know from the pool and it will feel like I’m talking to someone my age. And then other times she’ll tell me a story about “the boys who drove by in a jalopy” or make an offhand comment about how it’s great that they invented vaccines because she really hated getting whooping cough.

But sometimes, even the most independent centenarian needs some help. This past Wednesday, Mo’s car broke down in the middle of Hollywood as she was driving herself to a doctor’s appointment. She called me from her emergency cell phone and I immediately headed her way.

As I was approaching the street where her car had stopped working, I got another call from her cell. This time, a young man’s voice was on the other end. “Chris? This is Oleg. I’m with your friend Mo and I just wanted you to know we pushed her car into the ARCO gas station. We’ll stay with her to make sure she’s ok.” In the background, I could hear Mo yell “Tell Chris, I’m in love with you, Oleg! Tell him you’re my hero and oh so handsome! I’m proposing marriage.”

Oleg did not relay her message. But despite his reluctance to declare himself a handsome hero, I knew Mo was in good hands.

By the time I got to the gas station ten minutes later, Mo had already won over the gas station attendant, the guys who pushed her car, and the AAA mechanic who showed up to help diagnose her vehicle. I thought that I was heading into a chaotic disaster to rescue her, but instead I arrived at a scene where, despite the car trouble, Mo was holding court surrounded by a group of good samaritans.

I’m not trying to make too grand a point out of a stalled car, but I often fall into the trap of thinking that the world is full of dangerous people just waiting to take advantage of the innocent. This was a reminder that most people out there are good and kind and eager to help, given the opportunity.

It turned out that Mo’s car issue was more serious than a dead battery, so the AAA guy arranged to tow it to Mo’s standard mechanic. I called him to give him a heads up that her car was headed his way and when I told him I was calling on behalf of Mo, his voice lit up. “She’s one of the greatest gals out there! Tell her not to worry. She doesn’t even need to come in. I’ll figure out the problem, call her to see what she wants to do, and then drive the car back over to her house myself.”

So Mo and I left the car with the tow truck and headed to Trader Joe’s to get her some groceries and then head back home. At the grocery store, everyone knew her. In the entire time I’ve lived in LA, I’ve never felt more like I was in the presence of a celebrity. The parking lot attendant saw Mo, shot her a huge smile, then opened the gate and said “Right this way, ma’am!” She told me the cashiers typically carry her bags out to the car and load it for her and when she gets home she waits for a person to walk by and then shouts a hello and sees if they’ll bring her bags inside. They always do.

On the one hand, watching her work was a window into how one stays living independent and active past 100. On the other hand, it was also a masterclass in how being sociable, friendly, and willing to accept help when it’s offered, can make life more pleasant at any age.

One day later, Mo’s car was fixed, her fridge was loaded with lactose-free milk, and she was back on her way to the pool. The only thing that hadn’t gone her way was that Oleg didn’t accept her marriage proposal. But give Mo time! I wouldn’t put it past her to win him over.

My projects and upcoming events:

PODCAST: How to Be a Better Human (TED/PRX) - Dr. Barbara Fredrickson is a psychologist studying positive emotions. She believes that connection (and love) are about so much more than romance and of fundamental importance in our lives. I loved getting to hear her talk about what her research has shown it takes to make and keep strong relationships of all kinds. Listen here (or wherever you get podcasts)

RADIO INTERVIEW: All of It (WNYC) - For Leap Day (February 29th), the producers at WNYC asked me to help take listener calls and participate in a segment about the “leaps” people were taking on their bonus day. It’s always so fun to be on All of It and get to hear New Yorkers call in and share their stories. You can listen to the segment online here.

This week’s list

GREAT:

Growing up in a family with a Jewish mother and a Christian father, I’ve always been taught that you can have a deep, meaningful relationship to religion and also respect people who don’t share your beliefs. Unfortunately, in the public sphere, faith is often co-opted by intolerant people who claim to have all the answers. That’s why it’s such a breath of fresh air every time I read anything written by Solomon Missouri, a Christian pastor in rural North Carolina who isn’t afraid to speak out against hypocrisy and the mixing of church and state. This op-ed he wrote about the current embryo debacle in Alabama is perfectly put. PERSPECTIVES: Is the Alabama embryo ruling pro-life or pro-control?

“The questions that people of faith need to consider as women have lost the right to decide what happens to their bodies; why is cruelty the singular currency of your faith? Can a Gospel that breeds such hostility and animus towards its neighbors be considered good? Is it a “faith” if the state forces you to do it? And why are people who don’t share your faith required to follow your tenets under threat of prosecution?”

(Side note: Missouri is also the guy behind one of the funniest Twitter threads of all time - “You don’t have the cholesterol to be out here”)

FUNNY:

Aparna Nancherla is one of the funniest standup comedians in the world. She’s also a hilarious writer! If you don’t already read her substack, “Wait, What? with Aparna Nancherla” then all I have to say to you is… wait, what?

You have been missing out. Start with this past week’s superb entry on Aparna’s complete lack of musical knowledge. I like music and I refuse to explain myself

INTERESTING:

Shayla Love is a science journalist in Brooklyn who has covered some fascinating stories that I haven’t seen anyone else reporting. This recent piece in The New Republic looks at the way climate change and air pollution are changing what we need to be safe in our homes. But, as with just about every issue, the way the super rich experience the issue is very different from the rest of humanity. Love combines some hard-nosed data journalism with a wild story about multimillion dollar apartment complexes. “The wealthy have different houses, different cars, different lifestyles from the rest of us. These days, they also want to breathe different air.” The Hot New Luxury Good for the Rich: Air

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That's it for this week. Thanks for reading! Please share Bright Spots with anyone you think might enjoy it.

You are a handsome hero and I want to marry you,

Chris Duffy

This has been Bright Spots, a newsletter.

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…wait, who are you?

I'm Chris Duffy, a comedian, TV writer, podcast host, and both a former fifth grade teacher and a former fifth grade student. I’m currently writing a nonfiction book about humor for Doubleday.